Over the years we've flung an excess of certain emojis—mostly flamenco dancing ladies and pink, high-heeled mules—with wild abandon into our Whatsapp and Snapchat posts without ever considering the important questions: Would we really wear this? When does one use the prim straw hat symbol? Just who is wearing those rather chunky-looking red court shoes? These were the graphics and motifs bestowed upon our technology from the emoji gods, and we have loyally employed them ever since. But one fashion journo and blogger, Pandora Sykes, has rightfully asked a very overdue question: Do the tech bosses need to consider some new ideas for the season—or every season for that matter? Because if the humble avocado can make it onto the keyboard then why the hell shouldn't some Gucci loafers? We see just as many of those on Instagram…
So she put the current emoji fashion wardrobe to the test. Click through the gallery to see her the results, and shop for some guaranteed new-season coolness right here.
Outfit 1: Polo Shirt + Normcore Jeans + White Plimsolls + Baseball
Pandora's Verdict: "No-one’s worn a polo shirt since 1999 (unless it’s a Lurex one and then apparently they’re cool again)—especially not a grape-coloured one… Thank god for the normcore blue jeans and white plimsolls, which make this a socially acceptable if entirely unexceptional outfit."
Outfit 2: Kimono + Knee-High Retro Boots
Pandora's Verdict: "Everyone knows that a capsule wardrobe must be built on a foundation of multipurpose staples. There is nothing in the emoji repertoire that would go with either the gold boots or the kimono, and for that reason, they best belong together. My favourite outfit, by far, in that both pieces are now founding members of my very own dressing-up box."
Outfit 3: Straw Hat With Green Ribbon + Green Prom Dress + Red Court Shoes
Pandora's Verdict: "If I wanted to make myself feel like basic bitch’s grumpy old cousin, this is what I might wear to a wedding or something involving the words 'country club.'"
If you have anything that resembles the emoji fashion lineup let us know in the comments box below!
